On an average day Smolik does not say much - he is a
quiet man - but March 7th, 2009 was no average day. The stage was
set: 1 bluebird sky, 10 degrees on the positive side of zero, and 35 of
Ontario's top snowboarders ready to do battle with a down rail in the Horseshoe
Park. Smolik was armed with a megaphone and for the better part of the day
riders would huck their meat at his command. The obstacle was a perfect down
rail and whatever of-the-moment trick Smolik called out, riders would perform.
The event was called "Smolik Says" and it wasn't just a clever name.
The man with the plan: Smolik.
The comp ran lazy like all good events should on a sunny
day. The group of thirty-five males and two females (no discrimination of the
sexual kind here), started easy with each rider getting two chances before
getting knocked out. Unsuccessful trick attempts and presses not perfectly pressed
were met with the game show-style buzzer of Smolik's megaphone - FAIL.
After 29 men and 2 females failed themselves to the
sidelines the final 6 men were left standing to duke it out in a game of
S.K.A.T.E:
1) Jon
Rusk
2) Craig
B Gouweloos (CBGB)
3) PH
Powling
4) Jamie
Corneal
5) Jeffery
Robertson
6) Brad
Gauley
Smolik judging CBGB.
Sparing the details, many men did many tricks - but only
one man pulled the switch back 50 - back 360 out. That young apprentice was
Glen Eden local Jeffery Robertson. He rode a Capita so beat up that the top
sheet would flop around in the air trying to keep up with the rest of the
snowboard as he rotated on and off of the handrail. What a Cinderella story.
Rob Madill should give this jedi a new Capita. Or just make him buy one on
proform with his $250 winnings. Best to leave the young ones hungry so they
don't get too comfy like the rest of the five (sponsored) finalists.
PH Powling.
PH Powling wore jeans without a toque and finished 2nd.
Brad Gauley wore jeans without a toque and didn't place top 3, but still
impressed and left with a much nicer sunburn than PH. Jamie Corneal finished 3rd.
He must not have been wearing jeans or I actually would have watched him.
The day was not over yet. There was a brief post-Smolik
Says/pre-Best Trick Contest Party in the Crazy Horse. Note to future contest
organizers: it is always a good idea to hold a pre-contest party when the sun
is it out and the patios are full.
Skelhorn.
My girlfriend was all excited to watch the strippers
perform over lunch, but unfortunately the Crazy Horse is just the Horseshoe
Bar/Restaurant. They made up for the lack of talent by serving the beer cold,
the food hot, and splitting the bill up individually for every member of the
30+ posse. Smolik says - "tip the server 15% you cheap asses, I have to eat here
everyday."
Back to the hill, this time the staircase set took the
brunt of the rider's punishment. The ‘Best Trick' was a free-for-all allowing
riders to show off their whole bag of tricks. Smolik stayed out of this one to
hang back and dole out the cash as tricks were being stomped.
1st place, best trick.
Who won money? Jon Rusk and Greg Florio earned it by
tossing cab 270's onto the rail. Greg also performed the crowd pleasing ‘back
one switch nose.' JRusk's board broke every time he landed a trick. A clue
perhaps, that a man of such stature should not ride a miniature deck? Denny
Duquette rode well both ways and brothers in denim, Gauley and PH, proved they
didn't fluke their way into the finals by making all their tricks look proper.
Craig B Gouweloos rode so well, and has been all year in fact, that I will now
be referring to him solely as CBGB so I never have to type out his last name
again. Better trade in those baggies for some tight leather Craig. Victim of an
early knockout in ‘Smolik Says', Andrew Skelhorn made up for his departure by
riding like a boss.
J Rusk.
Rider's left full of slush, sunshine, and goods from
Nitro, Holden, Union, Ashbury, Sandbox Helmets, and cold hard greenery.
Horseshoe put on an epic event and Smolik probably won't talk again until next
March, so if you missed this you missed out big time.
March is Ontario's time to shine. For two and a half weeks
riding in this Province is amazing, all sun and slushy park terrain. Smolik
Says was a perfect kick-off to the event triple header that consists of the
actual Telus Triple Challenge: March 11-13 at Blue Mountain, followed by the
Quiksilver Downlow taking place on Sunday, March 21st at Moonstone.
Watch for coverage coming soon if you can't get out to watch them live and
enjoy the end of the season conditions.
Momar photo.
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Related:
Smolik: The Triple Threat
Down With Horseshoe
Horseshoe Resort: Signature Feature #2